How to write bad poetry - poetry
"All bad poetry springs from frank feeling. "--Oscar Wilde
People write poetry for a excess of reasons, but this condition has a sharpened arrowhead aimed candidly at the fingertips of amateur poets who wish to be available yet junk to learn the attributes of a well-crafted poem. These poets are the ones who plop their pieces, shining with every beam of ambiguity, ambiguity and hackney, into cyberspace for review. I have encountered a few of these poets to whom I have given a chivalrous critique, only to be oblique in the face by sore explanation such as, "You must be too dense to get it," or "Everyone I know tells me how great I am. You're the only one?"
Of choice I am customarily left wondering why a big shot would care to post a poem in a appraise forum if any constructive criticism given to the poet gets directly flushed down the cyber-potty. Many new poets seem to think that journalism a poem is one hundred percent emotion. They overlook the notion that, as with any craft, poetry entails a good deal of attempt and erudition as well as aspiration and talent. So in its place of characters about the magnitude of definite imagery, metaphoric language, and the art of minimizing abstractions, I belief it might be fun, (and might even tick a few citizens off) to write a small compendium of attributes of bad poetry.
Recipe for a Especially Bad Poem
- A bad poem be supposed to not have any creative language. If you aim to write a bad poem, avoid advent up with stark images. The last thing you would want to do is write a bit fresh, innovative, and evocative. Use as many clich?d expressions as possible, such as "crystal clear," "dark as ebony," "blue as the sky," "dark as night," "?paints a picture," "climb the main mountain," Etc.
- An in particular bad poem be supposed to be brutally biased with abstract words such as "heart," "love" "sadness," "despair," "hate," and "destiny. " The more abstract and comprehensive your poem, the develop appropriate it will be to mean certainly nil to the reader. Aim for zero definite imagery if you want a especially bad poem. For example, "The world is a grief-stricken place/ crammed with desolation and hate?blah blah blah. " Also, be sure to TELL the poet how to depict a touch by using superfluous abstract adjectives! "The water is pretty;" "The world is ugly;" "His eyes were beautiful?" A bad poem be supposed to never use abstract dialect or descriptive descriptions to SHOW the booklover a slice of life.
- No be relevant how odd the condemn becomes, or how doubtful the axiom would be imaginary in conventional language, make it RHYME. Rhyme anyway!! That's right, a bad poem is going to have very compulsory rhyme. If you have to rearrange the arrangement of a condemn just to make the rhyme fit, go for it! For example: "The apple blossoms fell in May/ on the verdant field is where they lay. " (Notice how I just couldn't say, "They lay on the lush field?" That wouldn't rhyme, so I had to make up a funky sentence.
- Don't worry about punctuation, grammar, or spelling. What you exceedingly want to do is to make the bookworm cut her head and read it a zillion times frustrating to amount out what it means. Bad spelling and poor grammar will exceedingly detract from the meaning, so get reckless with your words. Try this poem out for size:
i watch as the sun/ sets over the horisen/ the ocean pants/ like a wild monster/ breaths with heavy/ breath and then falls/ something small/ always gets lost/ in the mouth/ of agony
u r reel speciol/ like honi sweet/ from a candy bee.
- A good carry out for a shrewdly bad poet is to make the matter of the poem plural! Globalize your branch of learning for an incredibly weak impact! "Trees are?" "People cry?" "Flowers bloom?" By pluralizing all the matter of the poem, you are blurring the imagery, thus creation it sappy, intangible, and easily boring.
Frequently Asked Questions of bad poets who want to be in print but don't want to work:
Q. Who are you to judge what a good poem is? A poem is like beauty; it is in the eye of the beholder!
A. Paul Valery once said, "a poem is never finished, only abandoned. " You have to work on your poem. You have to find a a variety of clarity that will reach the reader. Every so often we get so fogged up with our own emotions, we don't exceedingly see the true poem. Emotional outpours make exceptional first drafts, but if you don't go any advance then that, you aren't operational hard an adequate amount of to make your poem good-even in your own eyes. Also, as far a judging a poem is concerned, as long as you hope to announce your poetry, it will get judged. Know what these "judgers" are looking for.
Q. If clichés were so bad, why have they been about for so long?
A. Exactly!! All and sundry understands clichés-almost to the point where they don't even mean something anymore. Poetry is an art of articulation and exposition. If you are too lazy to come up with the metaphors yourself, then you aren't exceedingly journalism poetry.
Q. I write poetry for delicate reasons. It is my way of production with the world. Why be supposed to I care what you think about poetry?
A. You shouldn't. If you are difficult to absolute your craft so that you can communicate by hand all the way through copy in some publication, you can write any way you want. Just know, though, that if you post your poem for critique, you might get some frank assessment based on poetic technique. If that is not what you are looking to get, entertain let associates know what you are looking to get.
Devrie Paradowski is a casual critic and poet. Her poetry has been in print by a number of literary journals and she has printed dozens of articles for a choice of publications counting "Poetry Regeneration Magazine," and "Poetryscams. com. " She is the creator of the chapbook, "Something In the Dirt," which can be found at http://www. lulu. com/content/108560 . In 2001, Devrie founded a common online literary cooperation ( http://www. LiteraryEscape. com ) that has develop into amply respected for some of the most candid and in-depth poetic analysis on the Internet. In charge with her dedication to inspire amateur writers to hone their skills, she also founded a local writer's group called, "The Fire and Ice Writer's Group. "
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